Ardross And Kathy....

Bobbyjo

At the Start
Joined
Feb 18, 2005
Messages
1,293
The best selling single of 2007 to date....

Disco 2007 - the story of Ardross and Kathy
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They were born within one hour of each other.
Their mothers said they could be sister and brother.
Cos they were similar, similar
Couldn’t admit it though
Oh they thought that when they grew up,
they’d get married, and never split up.
They never did it, although they often acted like it.

Oh Kathy, do you recall?
Your house was very small,
with Thatcher on the wall.
When Ardross came around to call,
you didn't notice him at all.

So he said let's all meet up in the year 2007.
Won't it be strange when we make people groan,
Dragging and pulling like the girls in Aldaniti’s school,
Ardy never knew that she’d be famous,
He would be living down there on his own,
Wondering why no celebrities ever phoned

Kathy was the first girl at school to get breasts.
Brendan said that hers were the best.
He texted her to say he was in bed,
So Kathy went home to help him get dressed.
Ardross was a friend that was as far as it went.
She wouldn’t even talk to him during Lent,
oh it meant something to him,
cos he couldn’t moderate it.

Ardross do you recall?
Your house was very small,
with Rooster Booster on the wall.
Kathy never came round to call,
She never noticed you at all,

So he said let's all meet up in the year 2007.
Won't it be strange when we make people groan,
Dragging and pulling like the girls in Aldaniti’s school,
Ardy never knew that she’d be famous,
He would be living down there on his own,
Wondering why no celebrities ever phoned,

Oh yeah,
oh yeah.

Ah Kathy do you recall?
Your house was very small,
with Avid Merrion in the hall.
When Ardy came around to call,
you didn't notice him at all.

So he said let's all meet up in the year 2007.
Won't it be strange when we make people groan,
Dragging and pulling like the girls in Aldaniti’s school,
Ardy never knew that she’d be famous,
He would be living down there on his own,
Wondering why no celebrities ever phoned,

Oh what are you doing Sunday Kathy.
Would you like to come and meet Ardy maybe?
You can even bring your mate David.
Ohhh ooh ooh. Ooh ooh ooh ooh.
What are you doing Sunday Ardy.
Would you like to come and meet Kat maybe?
She’ll be texting Patrick Swayze.
Ooh ooh oh. Ooh ooh ooh ooh. Ooh ooh ooh ooh. Oh.
 
:lol: :lol: :lol:

A wasted talent- very funny indeed

Can you write the parental advisory one about you and Aldaniti next :P
 
I have read it again - it is truly inspired :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
I think we should worry a lot more if Kathy disappears. Opus Dei has nothing on the Moderators' Section.
 
Kathy was telling her boss one day, "You know, I know everyone that there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
her boss called her bluff, "OK, kathy how about Tom Cruise?"

"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."

So Kathy and her boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Kathy! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"

Although impressed, Kathy's boss is still sceptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Kathy that he thinks Kathy's knowing Cruise was just lucky.

"No, no, just name anyone else," Kathy says.

"Tony Blair, "her boss quickly retorts.

"Yes," Kathy says, "I know him, let's go to London." And off they go.

At the Houses of parliament, Blair spots Kathy on the tour and motions her and her boss over, saying, "Kathy, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."

Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave Parliament, he expresses his doubts to Kathy, who again implores him to name anyone else.

"The Pope," her boss replies. "Sure!" says Kathy. "My folks are from Germany, and I've known the Pope a long time." So off they fly to Rome.

Kathy and her boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Kathy says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope." And she disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.

Sure enough, half an hour later Kathy emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But by the time Kathy returns, she finds that her boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working her way to her boss' side, Kathy asks him, "What happened?"

Her boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, 'Who's that on the balcony with Kathy?'"
 
Just a couple of minor corrections, Tetley. My Dad is Irish and I would never in a million years admit to knowing Blair. :blink:

Apart from that, as good as Bobbyjo's effort although the thought of Ardross being a brother to me :nerd:
 
Good idea, Bobbyjo - while An Capall scans his 'Lyric Writers' Guide' trying to find something which rhymes with 'Cromwell'...
 
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