Beware The Ikea Scam

BrianH

BrianH

At the Start
Joined
May 3, 2003
Messages
6,108
Location
Banstead, Surrey
For those of you who may be regular IKEA customers, I would like to draw your attention to a clever scam of which I became a recent victim. Don't be naive enough to think that it couldn't happen to you.

Here's how it works. Two seriously good looking girls in their early twenties come over to your car whilst you are putting your goods in the boot. They both start wiping your windscreen with a cloth and window cleaner, allowing their breasts to almost fall out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer a tip they politely refuse and instead ask if you could kindly drop them off at another store, like Homebase, on your way home. You agree and they both get in the backseat of your car.

On the way home they start fondling each other and ask you to pull over in a quiet backstreet. Then one of them climbs into the front with you, starts kissing and then performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen on February 9th, 10th, 12th, 16th and twice yesterday. I think it might happen again this weekend, so be careful out there, you have been warned.
 
I sent the warning to a mate who lives in Downpatrick. This was his reply:

" Thanks for the warning. There is no Ikea in Northern Ireland, can you recommend anywhere else so that I might avoid them."
 
Originally posted by BrianH@Feb 21 2007, 05:26 PM
For those of you who may be regular IKEA customers, I would like to draw your attention to a clever scam of which I became a recent victim. Don't be naive enough to think that it couldn't happen to you.

Here's how it works. Two seriously good looking girls in their early twenties come over to your car whilst you are putting your goods in the boot. They both start wiping your windscreen with a cloth and window cleaner, allowing their breasts to almost fall out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer a tip they politely refuse and instead ask if you could kindly drop them off at another store, like Homebase, on your way home. You agree and they both get in the backseat of your car.

On the way home they start fondling each other and ask you to pull over in a quiet backstreet. Then one of them climbs into the front with you, starts kissing and then performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen on February 9th, 10th, 12th, 16th and twice yesterday. I think it might happen again this weekend, so be careful out there, you have been warned.
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Krizon and Songsheet spent time in Holloway for this trick in the 1960s except they used to hang around Timothy Whites - all beehives and long white boots.

And they skipped the oral sex and went for the cosh behind the back of the knees.
 
Flattery alert!

I did have a pair of long white 'crushed' vinyl boots with platform soles, too, God help me, circa 1970-71. With matching white shoulder bag. I remember tottering across a railway platform on my way to my job interview for Saudi, wearing those and a midcalf, Princess-line dress with a contrast top, in shades of violet. Two delightful Caribbean porters looked me up and down and the oldest - like Grandpa age - said "My, my, doan she look fine now?" as I tittupped past. I got the job, but I was far more chuffed at lookin' fine. :luv:
 
Sorry to disillusion you, James, but I was most assuredly at school in the 60's - no white boots and no beehive - and certainly no make-up! My parents would have had a fit!

In fact my first 'beehive' hair do was a couple of years ago at a fifties-themed birthday party.

Mighty fine I looked too!
 
Originally posted by BrianH@Feb 21 2007, 04:26 PM
For those of you who may be regular IKEA customers, I would like to draw your attention to a clever scam of which I became a recent victim. Don't be naive enough to think that it couldn't happen to you.

Here's how it works. Two seriously good looking girls in their early twenties come over to your car whilst you are putting your goods in the boot. They both start wiping your windscreen with a cloth and window cleaner, allowing their breasts to almost fall out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer a tip they politely refuse and instead ask if you could kindly drop them off at another store, like Homebase, on your way home. You agree and they both get in the backseat of your car.

On the way home they start fondling each other and ask you to pull over in a quiet backstreet. Then one of them climbs into the front with you, starts kissing and then performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen on February 9th, 10th, 12th, 16th and twice yesterday. I think it might happen again this weekend, so be careful out there, you have been warned.
Click to expand...
Damnation.... my nearest Ikea is in Seville.....
 
Originally posted by Relkeel+Feb 23 2007, 03:06 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Relkeel @ Feb 23 2007, 03:06 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Colin Phillips@Feb 23 2007, 09:35 AM
There's someone's fantasy destroyed.
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That might be the case for some, but I've got a nice image of Songsheet in her school uniform in my head... [/b][/quote]
My image of Julie involves jackboots.
eek.gif
 
The Uzi, or perhaps even better, the Ouzo?

There once was a big Russian floozy
Real handy with grenade and Uzi
But she met a young Greek
And went silly and weak
On Ouzo, the floozy was woozy.
 
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