Children Worse Than "passive" Smoking?

Hmmmmmmm, I'm a 'breeder' am I? :what:

A very interesting article. On the other forum I use there are quite a few people who are very anti-child. They seem to find small people utterly repulsive and this comment made me think of them :lol:

"Still, there will probably always be people out there who will kiss Fido on the mouth but sneer at your little guy or girl".

So true :rolleyes:

Besides, kids aren't the only ones misbehaving, says Wasmund. "I see more adults behaving badly in public than children,” she says, noting they leave messes around the tables at bookstores, they speak too loudly on their cell phones and they’re more likely than children to be pushy and rude.

I agree with that too. A two year old having a temper tantrum in a public place knows no better, but a lot of people seem to be more tolerant of adults being rude and badly behaved.
 
No-one seems to know how to parent in public now: screaming, yelling, hyperactive and uncontrolled brats are everywhere. I don't adore children per se, any more than I adore any one thing per se - there are individuals which are nicer to know than others, as there are in any walk of life. I like kids who are quiet in public places, out of respect for other people's right to the enjoyment of that space; who KNOW better than to knock things off shelves and leave them on the floor for someone else to pick up; who KNOW not to run screaming up and down past me for an entire half-hour while I'm eating my lunch in a park, while their obese mothers bellow into mobile phones; I like kids who behave as if they're going to eventually make the sort of adults you want to know, not cross the street to avoid.
 
I think its just society today Kri, that we live in, where there is truly no respect for those around us. The mentality that is around today is all about the "me" factor and not the "us" factor.

The sad thing is its a reflection on all of us as whole race of people, and there is no particular generation that stands out above the other.

Society was not fair to me back in January, when I fell down a set of concrete stairs at a public train station in the city of Sydney. Did anyone stop to ask me if I was ok, or if I needed help? No they didn't, instead I was spat on by a passing commuter whom said to me "Move out of the f***king way you stupid c**t, you are in my way I will miss my train." I then had to grab my shoes, which meant ambling up the stairs awkwardly, and having to hobble to the train station, a huge gash in my foot, my heart absolutely broken because of humanity, and tears pouring down my face. I did a bit of damage to my ligaments and tendons that day, and some days wish I had actually fractured my foot, because sometimes the pain is practically unbearable.

Not one person stopped for me that day, which just goes to show how much we do care for each other as a whole.
 
I hate weans. Pretty much all of them.

I'm not too keen on many adults either.

Although when I fell down a set of stairs at a public train station (is there another type?), my fellow human beings helped considerably in assisting me to my feet, signalling to the driver to hold on a minute (which he did), retrieving my glasses for me and generally being very caring and helpful.
 
Yes, those were adults, though - there are pigs among us, and there are decent folk, too. As for kids - to be honest, some of the best-behaved I've met have been those coming in with their owner or trainer parents at racecourses. Perhaps an attachment to horses has a good influence on the little buggers!
 
I am so proud of my girls and the positive comments we often receive. Their behaviour in public is first class and it always has been. They're well trained! Running about, screeching and making a nuisance of themselves is not allowed. Neither is picking things up off of shelves. Some of the worst behaviour in children is seen on a trip to the park. Horrid little brats pushing other children off of the equipment, bullying, not waiting their turn, foul language and all in full view of the adults responsible for them. Good behaviour isn't inbuilt, it needs to be taught from day one by the family around them and in this day and age there are so many adults who cannot behave themselves in social situations and their unfortunate children are learning this inappropriate behaviour, growing up believing it's normal.

Parents need to take more responsibilty for the mini adults they're producing. I was shocked by one little boy who is going to be in Emilys class when she starts school in September. In July all the new children spent a morning in their new class. They were to stay until after lunch and could either take a packed lunch with them or try out the school dinners. One mother announced she would be collecting her son before they had lunch as there was nothing he would eat there. Perplexed, the teacher showed her what was on the menu that day. No, she was insistant her son wouldn't touch any of that. She needed to take him home to feed him sausage, chips and beans because that's all he'll eat for lunch and that dinner every night came from McDonalds :o The poor little boy is only four years old and overweight. She has allowed him to become that way when instead she should've been ensuring he ate a balanced diet. Nobody should be held to ransom by a small child for goodness sake! She is failing him as a mother and it was very sad to see.

However I do know people who have children with learning & mental disabilites. Not every five year old having a tantrum in a shop is doing it because they're badly behaved and ill controlled. Their parents don't all deserve condemnation.
 
Doesn't the fat 4 y.o. get inspected by a family nurse or whatever they're called, Griffin, when he has jabs and aftercare? I'd have thought that she or he would be making some strong recommendations about building his future health, which the mother isn't doing. He's conditioned her at an early age to meet his demands, from the sound of it, and she is too weak-willed to impose order. He doesn't know what's good for him at that age, but she has no excuse.

Mind you, bad parenting isn't something entirely new. A little boy living near me was fed sugar sandwiches as a regular shut-you-up, while another had no teeth, since they'd been rotted by endless sweets and fizzy drinks, and not made to brush them. His mother was horrendously fat, stupid, unkempt and lazy, in fact a real slut, and she'd just give 'Porky' (yes, that was his nickname!) what he wanted whenever he howled for it. This was in the 1950s and I think some parents went crazy following the end of rationing, stuffing their kids with all of the 'nice things' they'd been denied post-war. My own mother used to get furious if I wheedled (charmingly, rather than through squalling) sweets from my Grandmother!
 
I expect she has been given advise by a nurse or health visitor but she seemed rather ignorant and intent on having an easy life. Even if she were to suddenly realise how silly she had been it'll be tough for a while as she changes his eating habits. It's obviously too much of an effort for her to prepare a meal using fresh ingredients every night when Macdonalds is a few miles up the road. She really ought to be forced to watch Supersize Me. It'll be interesting to see what happens in September. The school are very keen and pro-active to support healthy eating and they'll not be too pleased if he's taken out every lunch time to be fed junk. They provide free fruit for the children to eat, junk food isn't allowed in lunchboxes and the standard of the cooked meals has improved greatly.

The importance of healthy eating is drummed into the children. Such a pity that he has to wait until he's at school to learn basic common sense that his mother should've known.
 
Originally posted by simmo@Aug 16 2006, 07:56 AM
Although when I fell down a set of stairs at a public train station (is there another type?), my fellow human beings helped considerably in assisting me to my feet, signalling to the driver to hold on a minute (which he did), retrieving my glasses for me and generally being very caring and helpful.
There are severals areas on the Sydney lines that are owned by private entities, such as the airport line, and also the Olympic stadium site. They are linked to the public line, but are all managed and serviced by their own employees.

Its a bizarre system, pay more to use those stations too.
 
Some parents seem to feel that it's their right to go out to a restaurant or a pub with the kids in tow and then allow them to run wild while they get on with their socialising. This is effectively leaving them in the care of strangers. I have to admit that some brats have accidentally collided with a stray elbow or tripped over a carelessly spread leg.
 
I'd agree with that comment, Archie.

Well trained kids are grand - much like people who go out with well trained dogs or horses. Unfortunately too many people just can't be bothered to keep an eye on their little darlings or stop them from running amok, screaming and causing general havoc. It's very tempting sometimes to want to tell someone to either grab hold of their child, stick it on reins (all kids under the age of about 4 should be on reins in public - I was!!! :lol:) or give it a damn good talking to!
 
Many years ago a colleague of mine was having Sunday lunch in a restaurant with his wife and three year old son. The boy was playing up as only two and three year olds can. My colleague pointed to a man lunching alone on a nearby table - "You see that man there? He's a policeman and if you carry on like this he's going to take you to the police station and put you in the cells."

The boy got down from his seat slowly, walked across to the man who had been pointed out to him and kicked him soundly in the shins!

I don't know whether there is any connection but he grew up to join the Parachute Regiment.
 
A good investment for any restaurant would be a few Gameboys.

I see no problem with Restaurants mentioning that they are unsuitable for children (or having timeslots when they are welcome). I used always check when booking a place I wasn't familiar with, far fewer claimed unsuitability than were unsuitable.

I wish we could adopt the French attitude towards children's menu's in restaurants. Among my man's dining experiences when he was about 6 were Artichoke Soup, Seared Tuna, umpteen types of plain fresh fish and mussels - all of which were eaten and enjoyed. Sort of puts chicken nuggets, fish fingers and sausages in the shade(which I am sure he'd have gone for if available - I tended to pick places where they weren't). It's amazing the amount of kids who love mussels, I think picking the mussel out using an empty shell is the attraction. Maybe if kids were having a proper dining experience instead of stuffing down few gobfulls of nuggets in 2 minutes they wouldn't have so much time to run riot around the place.
 
Children are becoming increasingly isolated in our society today. Their parents are products of the instant gratification generation (as evidenced by the debt-ridden society we have become) and anything that involves effort and imagination and actually interacting with their children is anathema. Far easier to shove another DVD into the machine or buy a new PC game.

So you have a new breed of kid that simply can't amuse themselves - reading isn't 'fashionable' - and when they are placed in situations where they can't watch TV or be glued to Playstation XXXIII, they act up because they're bored.

Of course there are still many parents out there who make the effort but they are no longer in the majority and we are all probably guilty of wanting certain places to be 'kid-free', rather than make the effort to be pleasant to other people's children when in restaurants and help share the load of harrassed parents who do try to make some attempt to keep them in order. I defy anyone on this forum who is a parent not to admit to having had a toddler throw a 'wobbly' at least once in their lives in some public place ! It's every responsible mother's nightmare but, other than being firm, quiet and controlled with the child, there's very little you can actually do about it!

I had the pleasure last week of taking my friend's almost 11yo daughter away for a night to cattle sale up in Carlisle. It was her first trip on a 'proper' train (a five hour journey!) and she enjoyed every minute of it. She's an avid reader, which helped but we also chatted away about the places we were passing, a very pleasant couple opposite also made time to have an interesting chat with her, various people at the sale that we knew took time out to talk to her and so actively interested adults made her trip into a proper event for her. We genuinely had great fun !
 
Originally posted by Songsheet@Aug 16 2006, 02:08 PM
I defy anyone on this forum who is a parent not to admit to having had a toddler throw a 'wobbly' at least once in their lives in some public place ! It's every responsible mother's nightmare but, other than being firm, quiet and controlled with the child, there's very little you can actually do about it!

There are right and wrong ways to handle this though. A parent can make a bigger fool of themselves than the child by shouting loudly and even swearing at the naughty infant in an attempt to get them to behave. I really hate it when I see parents shouting at their children in public. Mr GG is a lot more tolerant than I am in a shop where one of the girls has a strop. I'll have a few stern words with them and generally they stop. Emily has thrown herself to the floor on a few ocassions and I've walked away. Without the audience she wanted, she soon gets up to join me.
 
Thankfully my children have almost all made it to adulthood now and are starting to leave me alone. Those who have met them will attest to my excellent parenting and their wonderful good manners. Even that didn't dilute my belief in the old adage.

"Children are like farts. I can just about stand my own."
 
Mel - I so agree with you. I was carted around from wriggling infant stage (in a carrycot - really just a little snuggly bed with carrying handles, bunged on the floor or a spare seat on the Tube, none of that 4 x 4 size buggy nonsense) and once I turned 7, I ate as an adult, with admittedly smaller portions! My parents made lunch and dinner for all of us, although occasionally I'd be given a supper of, say, cheese or tomatoes on toast if I didn't want the trencherman's meal my father would sink. Otherwise, we went to my parents' family and friends and I was treated like one of the group until I fell asleep.

I could ALWAYS amuse myself by going outside, playing with any available pets, reading books, and playing with any toys I'd taken. I never expected to be entertained BECAUSE I was a kid, and no-one expected to do so. Of course, we did play games like hide-and-seek, snowballing and toboganning in winter, etc., but I was never made into some over-indulged pet, and certainly never called 'a little princess'. (Ugh!)

I never once threw a strop, although I tested my will against the resolve of adults' several times. I once refused to say 'may I please be excused?' from the dining table when my parents left me for a day with some friends. They'd been advised that I'd recently started to act a little bolshie about niceties, and they had full permission to not release me unless I asked. Which I declined to do. Nearly five hours later, I begrudgingly capitulated and was permitted to play outside! It just takes the WILL of adults vs kids, that's all!
 
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