I Dunno...

BrianH

BrianH

At the Start
Joined
May 3, 2003
Messages
6,108
Location
Banstead, Surrey
...you take a few weeks off and all hell is let loose. To all the people who referred postings to me and to all those who sent emails on the subject, I didn't ignore them - I wasn't here. I trust that you have now sorted it all out, because from what I gather the forum was becoming very strange indeed.
 
Serves you right for pushing off then, LordH!

And what do you mean 'was' - you obviously haven't had time to catch up yet....! :lol:
 
Originally posted by BrianH@Oct 4 2004, 04:47 PM
...you take a few weeks off and all hell is let loose. To all the people who referred postings to me and to all those who sent emails on the subject, I didn't ignore them - I wasn't here.
Click to expand...
Where's the Out Of Office Assistant ? :rolleyes:
 
I did hear a rumour that Brian, now he is back from his travels, has volunteered to stand in for Aunty K whilst her pc is kaput. Please ensure, however, that all requests for advice are correctly addressed to Lord H ... :P
 
I'd thought I better qualify that post . Mr Hartigan is emminently qualified but I thought the goings on might be better assessed on a level that was more in line with Judge Judy :D rather than the High Court . I'm sure Ricky Lake would love to have us all on . :rolleyes:
 
I'm not sure that I'd make a good agony aunt:

Dear Auntie Brian,
I have been married for five years and have two lovely little children. We are a very happy family. Recently I was promoted at work and I now have a PA to manage my office for me. She is an exceptionally good-looking young lady who reminds me very much of Kylie Minogue. She has an outstanding figure and an attractive way of dressing, which can include on different occasions low cut tops, very short skirts, stockings and suspenders, long high-heeled boots and sometimes she goes without underwear. She has let it be known in a rather unsubtle manner that she finds me as attractive as I find her. Soon I have to travel to Milan for a week long conference and she has been dropping very strong hints that she should accompany me. Although it is company policy that managers are allowed to take an assistant with them to the annual conference I feel that it would be wrong for me to take Melanie as there is a strong possibility that at some stage during the trip I could succumb to her charms. How do I let her down in the politest and kindest way?
Yours,
Worried of Woking.

Dear Worried of Woking,
Don't be a fecking eejit - go for it with all guns blazing!
Yours,
Auntie Brian
 
Just arrived at the Talkinghorses Agony Pages

Dear Auntie Brian

Thank you for your reply . Unfortunately, I forgot to mention that I am married to a woman who, although presently no longer under the care of Mental Health Services, cut her last boyfriend's testicles off when she found out he was two timing him . I met her when she was on day release from Holloway. Does this change your advice at all ?

yours Worried of Woking
 
Dear Auntie Brian

I am close to despair . Having decided to take Melanie along I told her this lunchtime . To my shock she announced that this was impossible as her talents have been noticed by the Chairman and she is joining his office next week as his PA

yours Worried of Woking
 
Dear Worried of Woking,
(1) Get a digital camera
(2) Get photos
(3) Get a letter off to the board
(4) Get copies to the Chairman's wife
(5) Get promoted
(6) Get hold of Melanie
(7) Get laid
Yours in an entirely professional manner,
Auntie Brian
 
The following statement has been issued by TH

" We regret to announce that there will be no more " Ask Auntie Brian " after TH was obliged to pay hefty damages today to Worried of Woking - apparently al went smoothly until his wife found the digital photos . Unfortunately , as the Chairman was wearing a gimp mask she assumed the person in the photos was Worried himself . Worried accordingly lost his testicles , and his job when the Chairman found out where the photos were from and worst of all was successfully sued for sexual harassment by Melanie .

TH were planning to fight the case vigorously until we found out that Aunty K was to be called as an expert witness by Worried and was to testify that Auntie Brian's advice was such that no reasonable agony aunt could give "
 
Back
Top