I took this off the Betfair forum as I found it rather amusing.
Following customer feedback, RUK have announced a makeover of their schedules on days when they do not have any live racing to show. It looks a big improvement to me.
09.00 Naughton’s Coin
Popular racing UK presenter Peter Naughton reveals exactly how far he’d go to earn a £2 coin. This week, he walks naked on stilts around Trafalagar Square while shoutiong ‘I’ve on the Scoop Six’ through a megaphone.
10.00 On The Hoof, with Dave Nevision
Propunter and bon viveur Dave once again attempts to prove that some of the toughest jobs in the country can be navigated despite zero preparation. In this episode, Dave spends five hours dancing to The Macarena on a table in a south London wine-bar before getting a black cab straight to Ludlow , where he co-presents for four eye-watering hours with Mark Howard (contains strong language and adult themes)
11.30 The Apprentice
The young jockeys once again try and impress Sir Mark and secure the valuable end-of-series retainer. This week a furious Sir Mark questions why Gabriel Hannon hasn’t ridden out his claim after 35 years, while Paddy Merrigan confronts Nick Hewitt with a shotgun.
13.00 Bruce Almighty
Laugh-a-minute sitcom based around the attempts of a hapless newspaper editor to keep his advertisers happy without alienating his readership. Bruce attempts to appoint Norman Wisdom as his deputy, but the all-powerful Hoody vetoes the appointment as ‘too edgy’.
13.30 Weather
With Kirkland Tellwright
13.35 Paul Morrison’s Ja!
Bloodstock agent Paul Morrison with the latest of his series introducing the landed gentry to the wonders of the German language.
14.45 Too Many Hislops
Round the table chat show. Hislops Ian, Shaka and Lydia discuss the week’s political events, goalkeeping and the handicapping of Irish hurdlers contesting mid-grade British races.
16.00 Simply The Vest
Latest in a series of bittersweet Alan Bennett monologues. This week, a racing pundit from the Valleys reminisces about his time on television, the falling standards of the country’s ‘quarterwits’ and the time he shared a flat can of Vimto with Bruce Springsteen.
17.30 City Hospital
Derek Thompson is diagnosed with ME, CJD and TB, but discharges himself at noon in order to commentate on the Mascot Derby at Yarmouth . Meanwhile disastrous events at Newbury and Windsor lead Mike Cattermole to be told he is both myopic and colour blind.
19.05 Lucky Strikes!
Controversial undercover documentary in which left-wing agitator Nick Luck creates havoc. In this episode, Lucky infiltrates a group a Marxist dockers in Plymouth , leading to anarchy and violence on the quayside.
20.30 Nighty Night with Ollie Bell
Ollie Bell states the obvious over replays of the day’s racing, with his soporific tones sure to lull even the most ardent racing enthusiast happily into the land of nod.
22.00 Close
Following customer feedback, RUK have announced a makeover of their schedules on days when they do not have any live racing to show. It looks a big improvement to me.
09.00 Naughton’s Coin
Popular racing UK presenter Peter Naughton reveals exactly how far he’d go to earn a £2 coin. This week, he walks naked on stilts around Trafalagar Square while shoutiong ‘I’ve on the Scoop Six’ through a megaphone.
10.00 On The Hoof, with Dave Nevision
Propunter and bon viveur Dave once again attempts to prove that some of the toughest jobs in the country can be navigated despite zero preparation. In this episode, Dave spends five hours dancing to The Macarena on a table in a south London wine-bar before getting a black cab straight to Ludlow , where he co-presents for four eye-watering hours with Mark Howard (contains strong language and adult themes)
11.30 The Apprentice
The young jockeys once again try and impress Sir Mark and secure the valuable end-of-series retainer. This week a furious Sir Mark questions why Gabriel Hannon hasn’t ridden out his claim after 35 years, while Paddy Merrigan confronts Nick Hewitt with a shotgun.
13.00 Bruce Almighty
Laugh-a-minute sitcom based around the attempts of a hapless newspaper editor to keep his advertisers happy without alienating his readership. Bruce attempts to appoint Norman Wisdom as his deputy, but the all-powerful Hoody vetoes the appointment as ‘too edgy’.
13.30 Weather
With Kirkland Tellwright
13.35 Paul Morrison’s Ja!
Bloodstock agent Paul Morrison with the latest of his series introducing the landed gentry to the wonders of the German language.
14.45 Too Many Hislops
Round the table chat show. Hislops Ian, Shaka and Lydia discuss the week’s political events, goalkeeping and the handicapping of Irish hurdlers contesting mid-grade British races.
16.00 Simply The Vest
Latest in a series of bittersweet Alan Bennett monologues. This week, a racing pundit from the Valleys reminisces about his time on television, the falling standards of the country’s ‘quarterwits’ and the time he shared a flat can of Vimto with Bruce Springsteen.
17.30 City Hospital
Derek Thompson is diagnosed with ME, CJD and TB, but discharges himself at noon in order to commentate on the Mascot Derby at Yarmouth . Meanwhile disastrous events at Newbury and Windsor lead Mike Cattermole to be told he is both myopic and colour blind.
19.05 Lucky Strikes!
Controversial undercover documentary in which left-wing agitator Nick Luck creates havoc. In this episode, Lucky infiltrates a group a Marxist dockers in Plymouth , leading to anarchy and violence on the quayside.
20.30 Nighty Night with Ollie Bell
Ollie Bell states the obvious over replays of the day’s racing, with his soporific tones sure to lull even the most ardent racing enthusiast happily into the land of nod.
22.00 Close
