If A Horse
- Thread starter an capall
- Start date
Colin Phillips
At the Start
Roughly.
rorydelargy
At the Start
Not if the jockey keeps having to get off to clean up :suspect:
Desert Orchid
Senior Jockey
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2005
- Messages
- 25,042
Depends on the distance.
Desert Orchid
Senior Jockey
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2005
- Messages
- 25,042
Do you run or cycle better after a good sh*te?
In the old Racehorse weekly, Danny Hall once wrote an amusing piece about following horses in the paddock and on the way to post and punting those that dumped somewhere along the way.
I know I always felt more comfortable playing football if I'd managed a good empty in the half-hour before kick-off.
I suspect in this case weight doesn't really matter.
In the old Racehorse weekly, Danny Hall once wrote an amusing piece about following horses in the paddock and on the way to post and punting those that dumped somewhere along the way.
I know I always felt more comfortable playing football if I'd managed a good empty in the half-hour before kick-off.
I suspect in this case weight doesn't really matter.
simmo
Senior Jockey
Perhaps all horses should be made to carry some sort of add-on to their tack, into which the contents of any anal evacuation on the way to post should be placed in order to ensure that this is the case.
The shovel could be carried by stall handlers/ a course representative to ensure that health and safety regulations for the riders are not breached.
The betting public should be kept informed of all dumps taking place in the 24 hours before a race. The stewards, moreover, should weigh the material and use their going sticks to give a scientific assessment of its moisture content.
Perhaps all children attending racecourses could be rounded up into the parade ring to clear up horse turds. The world of science could then monitor them for the next 50 years to see if they have a propensity to grow extra limbs or move to Birmingham.
Alternatively they could be encouraged to throw turds at inconsiderate jockeys who singularly fail to dismount with shovels and nappy bags thus creating a major risk to human health.
My final suggestion would be to start a nationwide racecourse monitoring exercise to establish what the daily dollop tonnage/racecourse ratio is. The government could then commission an enquiry headed by Lord Stevens who is currently at a loose end and has considerable experience of investigating some of the $hit flying around sport.
Alternatively they could be encouraged to throw turds at inconsiderate jockeys who singularly fail to dismount with shovels and nappy bags thus creating a major risk to human health.
My final suggestion would be to start a nationwide racecourse monitoring exercise to establish what the daily dollop tonnage/racecourse ratio is. The government could then commission an enquiry headed by Lord Stevens who is currently at a loose end and has considerable experience of investigating some of the $hit flying around sport.
