Only In Ireland. Part 357

an capall

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1. The Taoiseach is appearing at a Tribunal of Inquiry into 'planning' deals in Dublin in the 1980/90's. He has readily admitted that a businessman passed him a brief case full of cash amounting to somewhere between 30K and 50K. There is uproar. Not because he got the money, but because they can't agree if it was in punts, dollars or sterling.

2. One of our top soccer players is flown home from duty in Slovakia on a private jet, having informed his manager that his Granny has died. The manager hears later that the Gran is, thankfully, very much alive. He calls player for clarification, who tells him that it was the other Granny. OK says the Gaffer and then hears a day later that the other Granny is alive and well in London.

The lad had a genuine reason to get home, but why did he kill off both his Grandmothers?


I love this country.
 
Have a look at the Other Sports section for comments on Number 2 under the thread entitled 'Ireland' an c!
 
When I got the billy on #2 BJ I was going to call you to find out if it ws real. I thought you were very delicate talking to Eoin Mc D about it.
 
I headed to Croke Park yesterday for the All Ireland Football final. (aka Cup Final/Champions League final rolled into one. Tickets = hen's teeth.). I was the only one of the gang with no ticket. I approached a Garda at the barriers and asked him did he know where I could buy a kosher ticket.

He takes off his cap, reaches in to it and takes a stand ticket out. Hands it to me. "There you go, I don't need this one." I asked him if I needed to pay money to anybody. "Ah Jayzus, not at all."

I love this country.
 
Regarding items 1 and 3:

The night Ireland beat England 1-1 at Wembley in 1993(?) I too was the only one in my particular gang without a ticket. One of my friends got me one only two hours before the match in the lobby of the London Tara Hotel, which was full to bursting with hundreds of other people on a similar hunt, by having the cheek to approach and ask a well known Irish government minister if he could help.

The Minister politely said to leave it with him, that he would see what could be done, but that he could guarantee nothing. Ten minutes later he came back with a ticket for which he would accept nothing in exchange.

That Minister was Bertie Ahern, now being probed by the Tribunal, the problem being that there were other offers of money around this time, for very large sums, which Bertie felt able to accept.

Perhaps the donors, like Bertie himself in the Tara Hotel, wanted nothing in exchange.
Now that would be a fairy story indeed.
 
That 1-1 win must have been our best win ever Grey! :D

Seriously, though thats a good (if slightly ironic now!) story..
 
No-one wins 1-1 like Ireland. Remember when we battered Germany by the same score in Japan? I think I still have the hangover...
 
i think the Only in Ireland factor regarding Bertie Ahern is the fact that the oppositon didnt want to attack him on his questionable financial dealings before this summer's election, as it helped him in the polls. Only in Ireland. They are attacking him now as they have lost the election.
 
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