What's The Most Stupid Thing

P

PDJ

On a break
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Because I will challenge you.

I left school and headed home. As I arrived home, I realised I had forgotten my keys. Now, any sensible person would leave a spare set with someone, and I did but my girlfriend stayed over the weekend and left after me on Monday so needed them to lock the door. Now, my housemate is also away for the week(naturally) so I have one chance. My bedroom window is open 6 inches. This is one of those windows with a catch which muxt be pressed in order for the window to open further.

My ladder isn't long enough so I borrowed my neighbour's. The only person in there was the mother of my neighbour, who is 84.

Now it gets really stupid

I decided that I would have to climb the ladder(being held by an octogenarian with unsteady hands), reach in to press the catch and then dive in through the window. At no point during this thought process did any common sense kick in.

I climbed the ladder and came up 5 feet short of the bedroom window. So I hung from the window sill and pressed the catch and then opened the window as wide as it goes(about 2 feet). The ladder was now far too far below me to step back onto it so I had to kick off a pipe and the wall and dive through my window, demolishing my blinds and ruining my shirt. I made it in the house and came downstairs to open the door.

I was greeted by a cheer from the crowd of roughly 15 or so, one of whom said that he had a much longer ladder so I didn't need to do that. Cheers, I said!!

I can quite safely say next time, I will call a locksmith...

Time for dinner! :shy: :shy: :shy:
 
It would have been even more stupid if you'd forgotten that the toilet was on the other side of the window, and ended up head first in it.

Congrats on surviving all the same though!
 
Great stuff, Paul - I managed to drop my flat and outer door keys straight down the lift shaft here last Friday - they did a perfect pike and back flip, before disappearing two floors down into oblivion! :D

I can't think of the most stupid thing I've done, because there's too wide an assortment, but I once offered round some toffees, unwrapped one, threw the toffee in the bin and stuffed the wrapper into my mouth! Oh, how they all laughed... :lol:
 
Hmmm... I've given my back catalogue of Dumb Things Done some further thought, and I remember going with a couple of male pals on an early morning fishing trip. Not that I was interested in the fishing, I just wanted a look around the area and the chance to walk around the English countryside for an hour or so. They were fishing in a private lake - very pretty, with lots of reed beds. "Hiya," I called out on my return, delighted with my hearty walk and Nature Notes, "how're you two do.... "

I never completed the sentence as at that point what I'd taken to be solid reed matting gave way, and I sank straight into oozy black mud up to my waist! The guys pissed themselves laughing and I couldn't move, as I was helpless with giggles. If they'd only had a camcorder, we could've starred on 'You've Been Framed!'
 
Jon I think you already know part of my stupid history . That is to say the version that includes a middle aged overweight pompous and verbose racing personality
 
Oh, Solerina - no, no, no, NOT McCririck, please! :cry: Now THAT would not be so much stupid, but in the most appallingly bad taste!

(The one I know about, of course, you have just got to put down to collecting notches on the bedpost!) ;)
 
I once set myself on fire drinking a shot of absinthe. My nose was red for 18 months. Boy, I paid for that night.
 
Jon, I think most of us have thrown the sweet away and kept the wrapper before, its a great one for other people, i just felt disppointed that a toffee had got away from me!!

When I lived in Cambridge I was out with a few friends and had consumed one or two drinks. Walking through the city centre we spotted a row of 15-20 punts tied up and decided to have a race along the punts. All well and good so far.
I won the race and only then realised that the others were running inside the punts and so could stop a foot agaisnt the side, i on the other hand was racing on the smooth bows so sailed off the end into the Cam, much hilarity ensued
 
Similar to the toffee incident, I have been clearing the table after dinner and on several occasions have thrown the salt and pepper shakers into a sink full of soapy water, whilst putting the dirty plates into the cupboard....
 
:lol: :lol:

Bobbyjo: you've reminded me of another 'nose job'. It was Halloween and I was working overseas with a bunch of Americans, primarily Texans. They like their chilli con carne at hellish levels, and we were preparing jalapeno peppers for it for the Halloween supper. Being straight out from the UK, I had no idea about the heat those little varmints produce, and having cut one longwise, jokily stuck it on my schnozz, making witchy cackles, which soon turned to real yells! The application of ice was useless: the pores came up like craters of the moon, my eyes streamed, the nose burned like hell for two days and did a fair impression of W.C. Fields.
 
I've done a few silly things in my time. One of them was when I was in my late teens, I took my car (my first ever) down to Bournemouth where my friends and I use to go every Bank Holiday.

After parking the car in a car park near the beach we all proceeded to a nearby club called the Dirt Box, and after a few hours loads of us proceeded to the beach, where we lit a bonfire (we were allowed in those days)! and carried on dancing. It was lovely warm evening and we ended up going swimming and having a great time. Just as we were about to leave I checked my bag for my keys and remembered I had given them to my mate Stuart for safe keeping. Off I toddled and Stuart quickly checked his pockets.... no keys! :what: He had been diving, and it didn't take a genius to work out where they were. There was then a mad scramble as a few of my more sober mates started diving looking for my keys. They couldn't be found. I shrugged my shoulders and went off to the Police station by taxi (wet and covered in sand) to report my loss and leave them my contact number at the hotel, and in the morning, Bank Holiday Monday I decided at 08:00hrs (and after a sleepless night worrying) I had to pay for a locksmith to break into my car as there was no chance my keys would be found let alone handed in . It cost about £100 which ( a good few years ago) was a lot of money to me - and still is! I went back to the hotel to collect my friends and my luggage only to have received a phone call to say that my keys had been handed in to the Police station at 10:00hrs that morning by one of the Bouncers from the club. :o

If only I had waited..... :( At least I didn't need to change all my locks at home too! <_<
 
What's The Most Stupid Thing You Have Ever Done?
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Amendment V

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a grand jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the militia, when in actual service in time of war or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.
 
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