Nazi "Traffic Officers"

Who do you love the least?

  • Traffic Officers

    Votes: 3 30.0%

  • Parking Wardens

    Votes: 7 70.0%
  • Total voters
    10
Shadow Leader

Shadow Leader

At the Start
Joined
Nov 9, 2003
Messages
9,884
Whose idea was it to invent this breed of neo-Nazis? What is it with them - a car breaks down on the hard shoulder and they feel that they have to close one or more lanes on the motorway for hours and hours - to whose benefit?? Other than their own, that is - I've no doubt most of them are power crazy failed coppers who in the interests of their own self-importance feel the need to bugger up the plans of the rest of us who actually have a life instead of closing as many roads as we possibly can to throw the country into travel chaos.

These jumped up little twats are doing more to snarl up the UK's roads than even the many cretin drivers on them who insist on sitting in one of the middle or outer lanes, crawling, and overtaking nothing whilst their inner lane stays clear for as far as you can see.

Then there are the delightful clowns who feel the need to switch on motorway information signs saying "40" or "slow - 40 - obstruction ahead" when there is nothing on the motorway for the next six miles other than around twenty odd cars. Do they think it's funny??? What about the "fog" signs - do they think we're all blind??

I feel much better now I've said that - it's been pent up all day :D
 
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They're called the 'Highways Agency' and you have my every sympathy. Most of them seem to be under the impression that they're actually accident investigation officers hell bent on enforcing every possible aspect of H&S they can dream up. I tend to agree that they're damaging the economy with the amount of wholly unnecessary road closures they indulge in. They took over responsibility from the police for RTA's about 5 years ago, and my God, don't they enjoy it. The police would simply check the drivers for legality, check cars for legality, take a cursory inspection, push the cars to the side of the road and leave it up to the insurance companies to fight out. 6 times this year the Highways Agency have prevented me from getting to work by inexplicably closing down the A34 because there's been a crash on the M40 (junction 9 - a notorious spot). I've actually seen accidents on the A34 which has resulted in them closing access to the M40. Why? The motorways clear. You'd have thought that they'd have been pleased to shift the traffic instead of preventing it from escaping and thus snarling up the roads. I did contemplate earlier this year a trip to Cartmel as it was a rare nice day. I was prevented from riskign it though, as I was convinced someone would crash a car on the M6 and the Highways Agency would should the entire motorway. Sure enough about 3 hours later it came through on the radio. M6 closed at Sandbach due to a crash
 
Traffic officers come out worst every time I'm afraid Betsmate!

Would you believe that I saw one of their vehicles stop all the traffic on the M3 at lunchtime on Thursday - they sat in the middle lane with the "do not pass" sign illuminated on the back. Why? So little Nazi no 1 could climb out of the passenger seat and pick up a plastic bag in the middle of the carriageway. Worth stopping a major motorway for? I doubt it. Not only that, but he started wandering down the road behind the car, swaggering towards the cars behind as if he were about to start checking them over or something!
 
The Highways Agency are in a league of their own for disrupting the nations traffic. As Dom says, frustrated civil servants who weren't good enough to join the police and who've clearly become intoxicated on the H&S training instead
 
:D

I thought I'd copy it before its gets re-edited

In April 2004, Highways Agency Traffic Officers began working alongside police on motorways in the West Midlands[9]. They work alongside the police in England in an attempt to reduce congestion caused by incidents. Overall it was estimated to cost the UK economy £3billion a year with the closure of one lane estimated at up to £400,000 an hour. The introduction of the officers was aimed to reduce the 25% of delays caused by collisions by around 5%.[9] The roll out of traffic Officers was completed on 18 July 2006 and they now cover the whole of the English motorway network,[10] using high-visibility patrol vehicles.[specify] They are supported by Incident Support Units.[specify] Yet they still seem to create more trouble than they are supposed to prevent by needlessly shutting lanes or roads and stopping traffic at will, in their roles as little Hitlers.
 
They've probably got a filter that notifies them of all new edits involving the word 'Hitler' :p
 
To make the point, there's been an accident on the M5 as I type and they've closed the motorway between junctions 8 and 11. Now in the old days this would have to be a series of multiple pile ups with mass carnage, to shut down three junctions for as long as it has. I don't know how serious this one is, so am a bit reluctant to jump the gun, but it's not unusual for it to be a run of the mill shunt or RTA for them to do this, and then spend the entire day photographing, measuring and trying to sweep every last possible piece of debris from the highway (regardless of whether it was a result of the crash)
 
Someone walking Northwards on the M5 between junctions 9 and the M50 was killed by a vehicle which did not stop. Northbound LGV's being diverted via A46, smaller vehicles off at J11 Cheltenham upto Junction 1 of M50 and back onto M5. The Golden Valley bypass, a dual carriage way from Cheltenham to Gloucester, which traffic merges onto from J11 now gridlocked.
 
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Shadow Leader said:
Would you believe that I saw one of their vehicles stop all the traffic on the M3 at lunchtime on Thursday - they sat in the middle lane with the "do not pass" sign illuminated on the back. Why? So little Nazi no 1 could climb out of the passenger seat and pick up a plastic bag in the middle of the carriageway. Worth stopping a major motorway for? I doubt it. Not only that, but he started wandering down the road behind the car, swaggering towards the cars behind as if he were about to start checking them over or something!
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Jesus Christ, Shads, that really puts the Battle of Britain into perspective, doesn't it? :p

Given that we're harping on about the roads, I would like to add temporary traffic lights to the list of things that get under my skin.
 
I'd like to add the Gib 'Road Authorities' to the poll, not that they would get more than my vote, though I reckon they come under the banner of Traffic Wardens.

This weekend has seen the annual Gib Dog Show. With 24 hours notice they posted signs informing anyone parked outside my office that they would be towed were they to be parked there over the weekend..... just so the Spanish dog loving (read: people who breed dogs with close relatives then chuck them in a cage on wheels on a trailer behind the car) public could park there instead.

Six months ago they had another similar show whilst I was on a weeks holiday, and my legally parked car was strangely missing (for insurance purposes, I hoped stolen - but seeing as I hadn't been able to start it for a month, I very much doubted it) from it's spot outside my office. Unfortunately it turned up safe and sound in the pound - but they wanted £50 to release it. I didn't pay and they crushed it for me.

What is really annoying is that in several free car parks, there are vehicles that are either abandoned (I had intended to dispose of my car anyway) or, even more cheekily, for sale from local garages.
 
The Gib Police love a road diversion though CF, it´s the only thing they bloody do.

They shouldn´t have had the dog show anyway - it was in the leisure centre which is surely unhygenic and a breach of H and S regulations?
 
cricketfan said:
but seeing as I hadn't been able to start it for a month, I very much doubted it
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Ah, I could always start the old girl!!!!!

Martin, that dog show has been held there for years. Try living next door with your balcony overlooking it, and hearing nothing but dogs barking in their cages for a couple of days!
 
Unsurprisingly! ;)

They were at it again today - signs for around eight miles on the M4 proclaiming "50 - slow, debris in road". Today, as on several other occasions, I failed to spot a single piece of debris for the entire stretch.
 
We have signs like that "20 - slow, debris in road" when someone gets knocked off their moped and they find out the horse riding helmet doesn't work at 50MPH when you're hit by a bloody car!
 
No - it's a cute dark haired police officer who looks about 19 - she holds it and keeps turning it round so different people can see it.

We still have police motorbikes which look like something out of Starsky and Hutch though ;)
 
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