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Your Favourite Uncle Smart Arse's Unofficial Blog

Aftertiming alert....it's been a cracking last 48 hours.

Sandown Park was quality and I absolutely cleaned up at Stratford last night.

Two of the (frankly, to protect my edges, many) things I don't much talk about here are my ongoing studies of race times and going stick readings.

And I also remotely (I don't go any more but then I don't actually need to and I save a fortune on expenses each year) follow Point-to-Point and Hunters' Chases and have done since 1978.

Anyway I knew from dawn yesterday it would be Soft (never mind Good to Soft) at supposedly-"Good" Stratford last night and seems I was just about the only f****r who did 😂 - so much disinformation flying around.

I also know how to read a particular Point trainer who has nurtured and developed a now outstanding young jockey in the context of that sphere.

So, I'm in an even more annoyingly good mood than usual as I sit here with the Sun streaming through the French window while reading those who are none too quick on the uptake at the best of times slowly figuring out (too late) what happened. 😂
 
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The gentleman's not wrong - I haven't bought a newspaper since the day I left the industry and the only TV channels I (rarely) watch are free-to-air ones.
 
"Leafy's" off to Derby Day on Saturday.

As a predominantly Jumps man, he wouldn't normally be seen dead there, even though it's just up the road from him in Surrey, but he's entertaining one of his "beards" by treating them to a day out, courtesy of R4R, naturally, "Leafy" doesn't do spending actual money.
 
There hasn't been nearly enough rain for my liking on Epsom Downs today.

But there's still time - plus there's meant to be a really severe weather front coming in on Saturday morning.

"Leafy" won't mind getting wet - he wants Midak for the dollars.
 
It's been an alright sort of a day on the betting front and I really wouldn't put it any stronger than that.

Epsom didn't get as much rain as I expected (and consequently hoped for after betting accordingly) but Minnie Hauk made things right in the Oaks.

Major weather watch for tomorrow as I've bet some right quagmire beasts and high numbers may be best in the sprints if it's as dire as some predict.

Unused as not needed today, but I believe in the golden highway right against the Stands' rail in a bog there.
 
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Here in Hampshire, 43 miles by car from Epsom Downs, the Sun is trying to come out.

I'm considering opening the French Windows before reprising my occasional visits to The Green Dragon in Beverley Market Square in the early 1980s with a pub lunch (cooked at home).
 
I'm all about Circadian Rhythms at the moment - which is actually just a pretentious term for making sure you get enough sleep by figuring out what time you generally wake up in the morning and go to bed about seven-nine hours before that.

It's a bit of a bind when you're an early riser living in the UK, but like your USA racing.

East coast is generally doable, West coast highly problematic.

I haven't half had some near misses the last couple of days - notably Golden Mind and Twilight Jet at monster prices, especially on the machine - but fortunately Minnie Hauk paid for all.

Low-key Sunday - ongoing system bets, I'm on something my main collaborator (who is in a good mood after pocketing place money on my aforementioned Epsom place duo) has put up at Goodwood and I've got my usual array of daily personal data model bets running, but nothing leaping out at me to force a manual intervention.

Better weather today, I might actually do a bit of gardening after I've been shopping.
 
Better weather today, I might actually do a bit of gardening after I've been shopping.
On the plus side, the system bets once again kept the Wolf from the door.

But on the downside I didn't get round to doing any gardening.

Still, there's always next week.

Or the week after that. 😂
 
I've got various projects, deploying various methods, across various spheres - if it's profitable it's worth doing in my book.
 
It's been quite a day.

One thing made me smile.

I got a text from Epsom racecourse telling me tickets for The Derby 2026 were now on sale.

"Delete and report junk."
 
I remain convinced Walsworth is a Champagne Socialist on the quiet.

As a non-drinker (alcohol
has always been too grown up for me) I'm more of a Coca-Cola Socialist tbh.
 
I'm a real ale person but I don't have a silly beard or wear corduroy trousers and sandals, like most of the Camra members that I have met.
 
I'm a real Coca-Cola person, but I don't have a beard (silly or sensible) or wear corduroy trousers and sandals, and I have never actively sought out other Coca-Cola drinkers, of who there must be literally billions.
 
Revised handicap marks is always a Tuesday highlight for me, surely reenforcing Maurice's comment that I know how to live! 😂

Picture the scene:

The Tesco's Finest lasagne and tiramisu two-course repast duly dispatched, the electric fireglow flickering gently in the planica fireplace, the La-Z-Boy recliner overseen by the faux-mahogany standard reading lamp and the evensong of crows and magpies squabbling over the carcase of a stray fox over the rear garden fence, Ian hacks his way through the laptop keypad like a fevered Dr Livingstone macheteing his way to the source of the Nile, he eventually reaches his goal - the BHA Tuesday updated official ratings pages and his imagination goes into overdrive: "Oh my goodness, Here's Herbert has only been raised 3lbs for winning last week's sprint by five lengths, Dumpinthe Sea has been dropped for losing out in photo, Slimzawanq has been left alone... what races are they likely to target next?"
 
One of these days I'll find that hidden CC camera Maurice has obviously had planted in my Hampshire Fastness Apartment - that is all FAR too accurate for comfort! 😂
 
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It's been a funny old day, but it seems to be ending positively.

By far my most profitable data model/system/whatever other pretentious title I want to give it in 2024 frankly hasn't been performing nearly so well this year, but it had a banging good day today and almost hit the Jackpot.

It's been a frustrating spell - beaten a head at 60 win on the machine and beat three parts of a length at 50/1 at Epsom on Friday and Saturday at The Derby Meeting, with only Minnie Hauk getting me out of jail at the meeting in the Oaks.

I'm really looking forward to Royal Ascot next week.

It's only half an hour from me, but I've only ever been the once (the day Black Caviar won - just!) and I've no intentions of going again.

I can see everything I want to see chez moi, anyway, so why bother?
 
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