Arse Cup

I'm sure there will be plenty of arseology on display during the rest of the week, so would anyone mind if I just snuck in a personal bit of arsephobia here - to the ditzy plonker who has now dropped out of buying my flat for the second feckin' time, wasting over a month of time and my money... I hope you wake up and find your nose has changed places with your dick. Thank you for the indulgence, Father Breen (who ran very well enough today, bless him).
 
Alice interviewing Ruby on horseback after Champion - race course announcement 'Distances are a length and a quarter and blah blah':

Alice: so Ruby, you've beaten Peddlers Cross by half a length....
 
Cattermole again with that idiotic commentary in the RSA .

Ok it is pretty misty down the back but that absurd delay and "dare I say it " was contemptible and an insult to connections .

It is not the x factor
 
Didnt strike me that he was talking as the commentry with that - more to someone next to him before he said who had gone??

not quite sure why telling the two horses apart is so hard given the colour and markings on them both - but its easy for me to sit at home and say this - i havent got anything else to worry about.
 
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Lesley Gurnham to BIG BUCKS' lass: "Where would you like him to be, jumping the last?"

Lass, possibly surprised at the question: "In front."

Gurnham, unfazed: "You got any superstitions?"

Lass: "Er, no."

Gurnham: "Well, fingers crossed!"

Wonderful - worth every penny. We need more 'presenters' like this.
 
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I don't know what C4 pay Alice Plunkett but you'd think they'd at least insist on a bit of preparation for an interview by writing down a few questions in advance. It wouldn't do any harm, either, to listen to the interviewee's answer. Witness this deathless exchange today with Paddy Brennan:

Plunkett: "... and what's different about this place?"

Brennan: "The atmosphere here is unbelievable, I think it boils down to the staff, the head lads, Nigel, there's just a great sense of humour, brilliant atmosphere and I think the horses feel that every day, it's a wonderful place, like you see this morning it's one of the most amazing places in the world, the Cotswolds and it's a beautiful place to be."

Plunkett: "So what do you think makes this place so special?"

Brennan: "It's a wonderful atmosphere here, it's an amazing place to work, it all boils down to the staff, the head lads, Nigel, there's a great sense of humour here and I think it all boils down to the horses..."
 
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I have nothing against Graham Cunningham per se, but I would much prefer if either Steve Mellish or Jonathon Neesom (preferably the former) were doing the Racing UK analysis during the bigger meetings.
 
Ch.4's wimmin presenters are a curse - gurning/gushing, uninformed/oblivious. Contrast with Lydia, for all she may've made some gaffes today (I haven't got RUK so don't know if she did). Why on earth they're hauled out once a year, like Rishi Persad for Royal Ascot, I've no idea. Time to put them back in the toy cupboard and leave it to the professional 24/7 pundits, male or female.
 
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I think you heard right, Trips: apparently, he stood at a jump with two Oirish-Bejaysus types either side of him and said "Which one is Ted, and which one is Ruby?" Ted Walsh, back in the studio, said "I don't know, but it's a Dick in the middle" or something like that. Nice!
 
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krizon said:
Lesley Gurnham to BIG BUCKS' lass: "Where would you like him to be, jumping the last?"

Lass, possibly surprised at the question: "In front."

Gurnham, unfazed: "You got any superstitions?"

Lass: "Er, no."

Gurnham: "Well, fingers crossed!"

Wonderful - worth every penny. We need more 'presenters' like this.
Click to expand...

Don't watch Channel four anymore and this sort of thing is why. Classic.
 
I was forced to watch Ch.4 as don't have RUK at present, Blood, but after that I watched with the mute off bar the actual races! It is too embarrassing for words. Does it go worldwide? What the hell can people think of these numpties?
 
I'm renaming Cheltenham "The Gaffe Track" after this lot - and it's not over yet!

I can't stand the fake psychoanalyst balls of "So, how does that feel?" after every bloody race, although Alice excelled in shoving the mike at AP and crowing, "Well done, Ruby!" The champeen was gracious and didn't knock her hat off.
 
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