Arse Cup

Nursery slopes stuff on the useless info front - nowhere in Thommo's league Chapman's arseness dervies from his personality not his info
 
From "Colemanballs" in the latest edition of Private Eye:

"Paul [Makin] is a good guy; he puts his mouth where his face is."


DEREK THOMPSON, Talksport Radio
 
:lol: :lol: Thank God Makin knows where his mouth should go - Tommo's still using his arse to talk out of!
 
Originally posted by Shadow Leader@Nov 7 2005, 12:19 PM
I like the look of Chapman with a 20lb pull!!! Talk about the dark Arse of the race!

Unfortunately, until this truly promising Arse gets promoted on terrestrial TV he will not get the recognition he deserves as an Arse great of the future. Those if us that are privileged [eh??!! - Ed.] enough to see him on a near-daily basis are well aware at how much talent the man possesses in Arse terms, eh, Griffin?
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Yes we truely are blessed with the happy situation of enduring Arses such as Matt Chapman and that scouse fellow on an almost daily basis :confused:

We were terribly busy on Saturday buy my ears picked up the commentary on one of the thrilling virtual races. The commentator implored the stewards to look into the whip action of one of the jockeys, something to do with his arm being raised too highly :rolleyes: FFS it's not real you twat h:) You cannot inject any enthusiasm into such mindless dross :rolleyes:
 
A virtual arse? interesting angle! I do feel however Griff, if I were given the mundane task of having to comentate on cartoon time, I'd probably be unable to resist throwing in a few sarcastic remarks, if only to keep myself amused so I have a degree of sympathy with the nominated individual on this one.

Much as I admire the vain attempts to introduce competition (principally Shadow's) we all know that Thomo is truly the 'arse almighty' and the only way this competition can be made exciting is to handicap it, or bet on Thomo's winning distance or something? Is anyone going to have ago at allocating any weights?
 
Hows about a competition without the King of Arses Thommo in it? We all know he'd win by a country mile in any comp, it's a bit like playing a load of Vauxhall Conferance teams against Chelsea. Why compete for the Arse Cup when it's a foregone conclusion as to who will win it? I'd prefer a Silver Arse Cup for all the other contestants :)
 
Flicked through some really old topics and saw that Peter Alliss was in the Cup a year or so back. What's happened to him?

Has he given up Arsing?
 
Was that based on him completely missing the fact that Phil Mickelson had a putt to win the Masters a couple of years back?
 
Seems a good plan of Griffin's, either that or going down the handicap route. The only trouble I can see is that even betting w/o The Champ and despite Chapman's rapid improvement of late, we're still going to have a long odds-on favourite in Willie Carse-on, I'm sure!
 
The more I look at this quandray, I'm afraid I keep coming back to my tentative suggestion on this thread and looking at different 'arse categories' aka the 'Cartier Awards'. It would at least allow Thomo the chance to win 'Outstanding Arse of the Year' whilst also acknowledging some other worthy arseness too. It would simultaneously introduce a more competitive element as well, since I'm not convinced that there are always 'clear cut' arse winners in some of the categories I put forward by way of suggestion/ exploration. All we'd need to do is agree on the different catgeories? Surely we could run a handicap simulataneously in the voting anyway?
 
Originally posted by Relkeel@Nov 9 2005, 03:31 PM
Griffin's plan is ludicrous.

An Arse Cup without Thommo is unthinkable.
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It's not ludicrous at all, we all know he'd win the Arse Cup hands down so it seems a little unfair on the other runners to be expected to compete with someone of his magnitude. A Silver Arse Cup is a wonderful idea for those who can only look up in awe to such a huge Arse.
 
So, was it "unfair to the other runners" to let Arkle run in the 1966 Gold Cup?

Thommo has become "The People's Arse" and The People want to see him compete.
 
Thommo could be bestowed with the title Supreme Arse Of All Time, hence why the forthcoming contests would not include him as his Arseness is unattainable for the mere mortal.
 
Originally posted by Relkeel@Nov 9 2005, 05:10 PM
...and I want to rub Griffin's nose in it.
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*Griffin runs for the hills...........well, kind of waddles as fast as her swollen ankles and feet will carry her*
 
But what if the Peoples Arse went the same way as 'the Peoples horse' on his reappearence? Could we really stand it?

I think we should retire him and pass the mantle to Kicking Karseon, who in my opinion would win anyway.
 
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