Yes, time to up date the running commentary on the greatest **** show on earth
Last week the Republicans held their convention. The first day saw #nevertrump delegates make their last stand. In a sheer piece of mastery of the news cycle however, Trump (the man who said he'd hire the best) couldn't extend the promise to his own wife, and instead used a Trump organisation secondee, armed with a telephone and google, to hammer together a verbatim speech delivered by Melania Trump. After denying they cribbed it, they eventually came clean and admitted it.
Tiffany Trump was also dragged away from New York's swanky cocktail bars to deliver a sort of speech. Perhaps Donald might even follow her on Twitter now? Mike Pence also gave his speech, but no one remembered it. Instead the accolade for most memorable speech fell to Ted (vote with your conscience) Cruz. Quite what Trump was thinking in even giving him a slot is anyone's guess, but at least he turned up to launch his 2020 campaign, and I don't think it any coincidence that Chris Christie was the first to pile into the Texan Senator either.
Then onto the final day, Trump unveils the secret weapon, a registered independent who didn't vote for him in the New York primary. On walks Ivanka with her impressive assets thrust forward. She got off to wobbly start by admitting that she wasn't a life long dyed in the wool Republican (its an open secret that she favours the Democrats) and then proceeded to give a 20 minutes address that came straight from the Democrats equality manifesto. Still, the stupid Republicans didn't know what they were cheering, so she went down very well. Then finally man god, Donald Trump takes the stage
He decided to blame Obama and Clinton for ISIS and the Iraq fiasco (not what he said in the South Carolina primary when he pointed the finger at "your brother"). He then went on to announce that he would abolish crime (good luck with that one Donald) and finally rounded off by telling everyone that he was their voice. iT was speech that was quickly endorsed by Louisiana candidate David Duke who jealously admitted he couldn't have put it any better himself
Then its the turn of the Democrats.
A few days ago Hillary picks Virginian Governor Tim Kaine, or should that been Spanish speaking Governor Tim Kaine, as he's now to be known. Its a safe selection you feel, but isn't likely to light up young people, a demographic that she's notably struggling with. Tin Can also secures Virginia for her, but I doubt it was ever in play to the extent that it appears. The state divides very predictably into distinct voting blocs with the NoVa area usually deciding who wins it. Hillary was particularly strong in NoVa, and Trump lost it to Rubio. I think Virginia was much more solidly for her than the bare maths suggest it is on the Romney map
So with the Veep sorted we move onto the next twist, and this involves Russian agents hacking the campaign emails and fronting the dump through wikileaks. Well within a few hours Democrat chair, Debbie Wassermann Schultz is forced to resign as the allegations that Bernie Sanders had made throughout the primary season that the DNC weren't on the level seem to have been born out. Basically the party chair was working for Hillary in preference to Bernie it appears (probably an open secret anyway) but now its confirmed and the fact that Clinton is caught in another bit of smelly stuff involving email and questionable dealing does little for her reputation.
More amusing however is some of the stories starting to circulate that Donald Trump is a deep lying Russian sleeper agent, trying to secure the white house for the Kremlin. Some times I'm jealous that we've only got Boris
