"Swine Flu"

dobbin said:
Nobody talks about the credit crunch anymore! :rolleyes:
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Every cloud ....

The swine flu jokes are already doing the rounds

such as " I rang NHS Direct today because I thought I had swine flu but all I got on the line was crackling "
 
I am also a great fan of Punjabi but this flu, has made me more "money" than the credit crunch in shares selling Airlines, Thomas Cook, and buying into pharma. I am now looking at Bowater Scott and 3M, Best luck for tomorrow, I also expect ins.prem. to rize as a resut
 
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G-G - I've got bad news for your friend in Bahrain. Unless the Sheikh's a lot stuffier than his dear old dad and changed things, all of the hotels serve bacon and pork sausages at breakfast time! (Well, they did when me owd Mammy lived there for several years, just as they served alcohol freely in bars, clubs, and hotels.)
 
Your Take-a-way sir, sweet and sour pork balls

G-G said:
A former colleague, based in Bahrain, emailed today to ask how we were all coping, and that they had been told they were in no danger as they didn't eat pigs.
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Try telling the Chineese, they eat everyting dog, snake, cat, and pig,
I don't see how eating pork could give you flu, IMO. flying in the there or back is more risky.
 
Andy said:
Try telling the Chineese, they eat everyting dog, snake, cat, and pig,
I don't see how eating pork could give you flu, IMO. flying in the there or back is more risky.
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Theoretically, if the meat comes from an infected animal and hasn't been cooked properly? That's my best guess I'm afraid.

If anybody is interested in current info try the Health Protection Agency Website:
http://www.hpa.org.uk/webw/HPAweb&Page&HPAwebAutoListName/Page/1240732817665?p=1240732817665

Department of Health Website
http://www.dh.gov.uk/en/index.htm

NHS CHOICES
http://www.nhs.uk/Pages/homepage.aspx
 
My parents went to the doctor yesterday and he said he is so sick of hearing about swine flu. As he put it "a storm in a teacup" created by the media.

The other day I was at the pharmacy and this woman races in, screaming at everyone to move out of the way. She then races to the chemist and said "I am sick, I have the swine flu." The chemist took one look at her and snapped and said "For god sake you have the common cold. I am sick of hearing about this swine flu."
 
A famous rapping artist has swine flu - front page of sun 2moro

were doomeeeeed
 
The swine flu seems to have gone a bit quiet, did you all recieve your goverment booklet giving advice on the swine flu?

We need to set up a network of "flu friends" to pop round and bring shopping etc if we happen to come down with it.

any volunteers???

I dont have it by the way but would need to be a very good friend wouldnt it?:<3:
 
Got my booklet a few days ago. Yes, I do feel a bit sneezy, Dobbin... would you mind popping along to Asda for me, please? Just the 50 items on the list over there, and could you pick up the dry cleaning, grab a Mighty Meat Pizza and Diet Coke on the way back, also, there's a dear? Plus, get the car cleaned and valeted while you're waiting, and just check up on... hallo? Dobbin? You there?
 
We had the delight of an email from our wondrous HR(that's on a par with the Stig joke) informing us on Friday that a case of swine Flu has been confirmed on the 6th floor of our building. We are on the 7th floor. Amongst the things to do and not to do, were not to come in if you think you have any symptoms but go to your doctor. As I am having to attend the doctors once a fortnight at the moment, and spend at least the obligatory waiting time of 20 minutes for my appointment, I am very familiar with the posters plastered across notice boards which categorically state not to come in to the surgery if you think you have flu, as no antibotics will help.The advice is to stay at home, drink plenty and so on. If symptoms persist or worsen, ask for a home visit. When I told our wondrous HR this, the comment was 'well we don't want people coming in here spreading it'. I told her that as this is not the advice being given out by general practitioners, perhaps she should try again.
 
A friend is a teaching assistant in a school in North London. Two weeks ago one of the children was diagnosed as having swine flu so the school was closed for 7 days. However, to save money, the teaching staff had to go in and clean everything. My friend has been sent home this morning after being diagnosed as suffering from it. That plan worked didn't it?
 
A friend of the family has tested positive for it. Quite poorly at the moment but we're hoping she'll make a good recovery. Fortunately I haven't been in contact with her although she's been round at my cousin's place last weekend so fingers crossed they'll be ok. Chatting with the local GPs last week and they've had two of their patients confirmed with it - not link bewteen the two patients either.
 
G-G said:
A friend is a teaching assistant in a school in North London. Two weeks ago one of the children was diagnosed as having swine flu so the school was closed for 7 days. However, to save money, the teaching staff had to go in and clean everything. My friend has been sent home this morning after being diagnosed as suffering from it. That plan worked didn't it?
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Sounds like a good claim to me why should teachers be asked to clean up, people Working at Wimbledon have been sent home and 3 players have tested positve to it,
It's not very clear what you have to do if you don't have freinds or family round you are you just surporosed to die quietly in your own home.
you could stave to death,

Let's hope bacon prices fall as you can't beat a bacon sarni.
 
krizon said:
Got my booklet a few days ago. Yes, I do feel a bit sneezy, Dobbin... would you mind popping along to Asda for me, please? Just the 50 items on the list over there, and could you pick up the dry cleaning, grab a Mighty Meat Pizza and Diet Coke on the way back, also, there's a dear? Plus, get the car cleaned and valeted while you're waiting, and just check up on... hallo? Dobbin? You there?
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yeah im here! are you ok?
 
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