Arse Cup

Nomination for the chap presenting Grandstand, Keith Fielden has joined him in the studio, well he would have but it was Stuart Fielden.
 
AC: I asked New Daddy Spencer how the babby was when he attended Lingfield on Saturday. His face really lit up and he says it's an excellent baby, no problems, and sleeps well at night, too. He looked a delighted Dad.
 
Nick Luck interviewing Oliver Cole today about his dads chances today at Kempton. NL rubbished the chances of one Fantaisiste in the 4.00 saying she had looked onepaced & lacking in speed last year (contradicted by OC) - Did anyone see the way she mowed them down in the last furlong?!
 
Originally posted by krizon@Apr 2 2006, 07:10 PM
Colin - you're planning on never meeting Griffin, are you? <_<
Click to expand...
:lol: :lol: :lol:

I know what he means, and to be fair it was probably called for. After having four babies I think I ought to have somebody looking after me at all times :lol:
 
Jinnyj: I just went, "Woweeeee!" on seeing that - it was SO impressive. She just zipped past like greased lightning, and what a canny ride she was given, too. It was nice to see one or two horses that haven't been around the established AW all their lives taking well to Kempton. It certainly rides a lot fairer than Lingfield, and there will be no excuse for any accidents caused by unnecessary bunching.

In an unkind way, I think WORCESTER LODGE has the craziest action I've seen on any animal, ever! I know there's dishing, there's climbing, and there's lots of knee action - but to get all three to the max in one horse is pretty impressive, in a completely bonkers sort of way! Poor old Arfer Daly finally let him thunder home in his own fashion - the horse must've felt like hell to ride! :blink:
 
Talking of arses

Written across the wall of a cave was this

untitled.jpg



It was considered a unique find and the writings were said to be at least three thousand years old!

untitled.jpg



The piece of stone was removed, brought to the museum, and archaeologists from around the world came to study the ancient symbols. They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss the meaning of the markings.

untitled.jpg



The President of the society pointed to first drawing and said: "This is a woman. We can see these people held women in high esteem. You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol is a donkey, so they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil.

untitled.jpg



The next drawing is a shovel, which means they had tools to help them."

untitled.jpg


Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish which means that if a famine hit the earth and food didn't grow, they seek food from the sea. The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were evidently Hebrews.

untitled.jpg


The audience applauded enthusiastically.

Then a little old Jewish man stood up in the back of the room and said,


"Idiots, Hebrew is read from right to left.....

untitled.jpg



It says: 'Holy Mackerel, Dig The Arse On That Chick'
 
What I couldn't believe about the Olly Cole interview is that I remember him as being about 10 years old....

I also reckon Barney Clifford is coming close to earning an arse nomination.
 
Ok - is anyone willing to lay me a price that Matt Chapman wins this year's event? There's an exceptionally interesting bit in the RP today that says that Chapman will be auditioning for The X Factor later in the year and is confident he will get through the initial auditions.........
 
I would almost go 5/6 each of two so irritating that Chaparse is.
Everyone was taking the piss out of him about the X Factor thing on ATR this morning,although why Zoey Bird needed to resort to a woeful rendition of 'When Will I Be Famous' I don't know!

Although not really 'arse' related can anyone explain to me how Alex Hammond contiunes to get away with and be paid for her lousy tips on Sky every day.
Short priced favs that regularly get stuffed (Pass Me On the latest today).
 
I had to switch off Racing Today at dinner time,he was getting on my nerves that much.
I guess it's partially because I would consider Chaparse and Thommo to be full time arses (ie they never seem to be off the telly) and therefore have more chances to show their 'arseness' whereas the Carsons and Pitmans would be more part time as we rarely see them outside of their BBC appearances.
Still I'm sure Pitman will be gracing our screens on the Beeb this week so he has a chance to show his worth in the arse stakes.
 
ATR started with the Chaparse screaming at the screen about not being able to wait to see YEEHAA! YEEHAA! Love that horse YEEHAA! YEEHAAAAA! In the afternoon, it was back again in its lairy suit, constantly wringing its hands like a younger version of Swiss Tony spying a possible customer, still uncontrollably screaming YEEHAA! even when it was not particularly germane. Fortunately, the wretched animal tanked off into the woods during the race, and we were spared further screams and shrieks from the over-animated baboon. Will someone, please, please, please, storm the studio and inject him with horse tranquillizers? His hysterical screaming and constant fidgetting ruined the viewing. I will take any amount of Pitman in lieu of this overgrown 5 year-old.
 
Originally posted by krizon@Apr 6 2006, 12:40 AM
like a younger version of Swiss Tony spying a possible customer
Click to expand...
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I agree Jon - just watching him is enough to make me feel exhausted.
 
"whereas the Carsons and Pitmans would be more part time "

What does a part time arse do in his spare time? My guess would be 'a lot of fannying around'.
 
Oh fcukin hell, have we got John Parrot for three days??

Absolutely no need.


EDIT: Richard Pitman - "Hedgehunter proved at Cheltenham he can go on fast ground, not the heavy we thought he needed"

What a clown, this thread is gonna reach twenty pages by saturday afternoon.
 
Back
Top