The following 50 points are probably the reasons why
> Gazza never fulfilled his full potential...even if you
> don't follow football this is worth a read!!
>
> Somehow can't see David Beckham behaving like this -
> what a shame.. Gazza is the man!
>
> 1) One hour after playing for England, met 'showbiz
> pals' Danny Baker and Chris Evans in a Hampstead pub
> while still wearing his full kit...boots included.
>
> 2) When asked for his nationality before an operation,
> told the nurse: "Church Of England."
>
> 3) On a trip to London, jumped out of his car to demand
> "a go" on a workman's pneumatic drill. After getting
> the go-ahead, happily pounded the pavement to the
> amusement of shoppers.
>
> 4) On first meeting with Lazio's president to discuss
> his big-money move to the Italian club, was quick to
> tell the esteemed gentleman that he reminded him of
> Russ Abbot.
>
> 5) Organisers of Italia 90 TV coverage had the splendid
> idea of augmenting team line-ups with footage of each
> player mouthing his own
> name. Gascoigne's genius led him to subvert the process
> by, instead, mouthing 'f***ing w***ker.' Broadcasters
> across the world had to use it all the way through the
> tournament.
>
> 6) Booked a series of sun-bed sessions for
> then-Newcastle team-mate Tony Cunningham. Who, of
> course, is black.
>
> 7) Asked by a Norwegian camera crew if he had a message
> for England's upcoming opponents, immediately responded
> with, "Yes. F**k off, Norway." Then ran off laughing.
>
> 8) Turned up for England training the morning after
> then-manager Bobby Robson had called him "daft as a
> brush" with a floor brush sticking out of his sock.
>
> 9) When asked for a footballing comment while at Lazio,
> burped enthusiastically into a TV microphone. He was
> fined £39,000.
>
> 10) Decided it would be a great idea to have massive
> hair extensions. Looked a fool and had them taken out a
> day later.
>
> 11) After paying for ex-wife Sheryl's breasts implants,
> sent flowers to the hospital after the operation
> addressed to 'Dolly Parton.'
>
> 12) Astounded commuters in London by jumping on a
> double-decker in London's Piccadilly Circus and asking
> if he could have a drive. The bus driver said yes, and
> the passengers thoroughly enjoyed Gazza's
> impromptu performance.
>
> 13) Sent a rose to the Wimbledon dressing room for
> Vinnie Jones after the infamous ball-squeezing
> incident. Got a toilet brush in return.
>
> 14) Set up best mate Jimmy 'Five Bellies' Gardner with
> a 'girl' he knew to be a transvestite.
>
> 15) Has taken the p*** out of refs constantly during
> his career. On one occasion he sniffed a hapless ref's
> armpit while he was holding his hand high to signal a
> free kick.
>
> 16) Undeterred by their frosty reactions, Gazza again
> tried to prove that refs have a sense of humour by
> yellow-carding the referee after the official had
> dropped his card during a Rangers v Hibs game. He
> was booked for his troubles.
>
> 17) While attempting to deflect the 'kebab controversy'
> which spelled the beginning of the end of his England
> career, assured reporters that
> his doner-munching antics following Middlesbrough's
> promotion to the Premiership would in no way affect his
> fitness before France 98. One reporter asked: "What do
> you feel like now?" Back came the
> inevitable response: "I feel like a kebab with onions."
>
> 18) As an apprentice desperate to impress
> then-Newcastle boss Jack Charlton, spent a week's money
> on fishing gear and begged the famous angler to give
> him a lesson. On arrival at the riverbank, Charlton
> promptly threw all but the rod out into the briny, then
> poured a bottle of Newcastle Brown into the
> water, dipped in the rod and within seconds was pulling
> out a whopper. Lesson over.
>
> 19) As 'perk' of boot-cleaning duties during his
> apprenticeship, took Kevin Keegan's Golas home to show
> his mates. But left them on the Newcastle Underground.
>
> 20) When playing for England against Belgium in Italia
> 90, ridiculed Enzo Scifo as he lay on the ground
> clutching his leg. Gazza thought he
> was play-acting, so did a mime of his own which
> involved hopping on one leg with his tongue lolling
> out.
>
> 21) His attempt to jet off to Libya with Middlesborough
> for a post-season tour was hampered by the fact he'd
> left his passport at home. An emotional Gazza wept at
> the check-in desk until a minion was
> despatched to bring it to the airport.
>
> 22) Celebrated his new-found hero status after flying
> home from Italia 90 by wearing a huge pair of fake
> plastic boobs and stomach bearing the legend 'Gazza.'
>
> 23) On meeting the president of Denmark's FA, pretended
> he could speak Danish. When invited to demonstrate,
> imitated The Muppet Show's Swedish Chef.
>
> 24) Conned Five Bellies into eating a mince pie after
> he'd scraped out the filling and replaced it with cat
> excrement.
>
> 25) Walked into the Middlesborough canteen wearing
> nothing but his training socks and ordered lunch.
>
> 26) Paid £320 for a Mars Bar in a newsagents in his
> home town of Dunston, then told the shop owner to spend
> the change on sweets for local kids.
>
> 27) Whilst dining in the prestigious Bedford Arms Hotel
> in Woburn with a few of his Geordie mates, decided to
> place his erect member on the shoulder of a diner at
> the next table. Thinking someone had tapped him on the
> shoulder the gentleman turned his head only to have
> Gazza's helmet prod him in the
> cheek.
>
> 28) Took a documentary team to a beautiful Scottish
> cottage which he informed them was his new place,
> pretended he'd forgotten his key and knocked instead.
> When the door opened, told the befuddled housewife
> inside that he was doing a telly advert and wanted to
> know if she preferred Daz or Omo.
>
> 29) Crashed Middlesbrough's team bus at the club's
> training ground and caused £310, 000 worth of damage.
>
> 30) While at Rangers, urinated over sleeping team-mate
> Richard Gough.
>
> 31) Handed £1000 over to Jimmy Five Bellies after
> betting that the burly boozer couldn't withstand a
> cigarette lighter's heat on the bridge of his nose for
> five seconds........Jimmy could. Twice.
>
> 32) After briefly giving up drinking, was advised to
> find a new interest. Picked bingo.
>
> 33) Bought a £1000 robot and programmed it to travel
> into Jimmy Five Bellies' room at Gazza Towers and
> announce: "Make a cup of tea, fat man."
>
> 34) Was banned from Liverpool's Cream night-club in
> advance within days of joining Everton, because the
> Evertonians who run the place wanted him to avoid
> temptation and stay fit.
>
> 35) Prepared for England matches during that hugely
> important tournament by playing marathon games of
> tennis in the scorching midday sun.
>
> 36) Thought it would be appropriate to wear a blue
> fright wig beforethe 1991 FA Cup Final.
>
> 37) In his time, has agreed to dress as a Roman
> centurion, a clown, Oliver Hardy and Braveheart for
> photo opportunities.
>
> 38) While his Italia 90 team-mate was the hero of
> Hillsborough, marched into a Sheffield barber shop and
> demanded "a Waddle cut."
>
> 39) When Gazza signed for Spurs in 1988, he came down
> to finalise the deal with a bunch of his Geordie mates.
> They took over the posh hotel in Hadley Wood where
> Spurs were footing the bill and wreaked havoc.
> Gazza met then-chairman Irving Scholar and began talks
> by saying, "We'd like to thank you for the best three
> days of our lives"
>
> 40) Was asked to leave West Lodge Park Hotel in London
> after guests were treated to the sight of a naked Five
> Bellies swimming across the duck pond.
>
> 41) On his first night in Rome after signing for Lazio,
> gave his minder the slip, put his shoes by an open
> window and hid in a cupboard. The minder thought he'd
> committed suicide.
>
> 42) Recorded a video message for a corporate party and
> signed off with a cheery "Happy Christmas, you f***ing
> w***ers."
>
> 43) Greeted reporters in Rome by standing up, asking
> for silence, then farting at ear-splitting volume.
>
> 44) Told an interviewer that he was so superstitious
> about the number 13 that he couldn't ever bear to see
> the numbers 4 and 9 together. Oddly, the combination of
> 5 and 8 was deemed OK.
>
> 45) Shredded England team-mate Dennis Wise's Armani
> suit "for a laugh."
>
> 46) While staying at a Scottish hotel, drove across its
> golf course in his four-wheel drive Jeep.
>
> 47) While reputation preceded him in Italy, the English
> language did not. Hence, his Lazio debut was marked by
> a banner which read: 'Gazza's Boys, We Are Here. Shake
> Your Women And Drink Your Beer.'
>
> 48) Conversely, rival Italian supporters once hailed
> him with a banner which stated bluntly: 'Paul Gazza,
> You Are Fat Poofta.'
>
> 49) After being sent off while playing for Lazio, shook
> hands with virtually every member of the Genoa side.
>
> 50) While staying in a New Zealand hotel, was told
> there was no bacon for breakfast. Replied, "What, all
> the sheep in this country and
> there's no bloody bacon!"
:lol: Jon...................just glad I made someones day.... 
